Okay so it's February and I realized that I did not make a New Years resolution this year. Now last year I did 14 for 14. And as a quick update of the 14 I accomplished travel somewhere exotic, get over my fear of commitment (still carry as s*** though), go to a concert of someone I've never seen (Cher is queen), write more, and tell people how I feel about them. So of 14 things I accomplished 5. So not even 50%. I still have some things to work on this year. So if you want to go back and look at that blog you can or you can just shut up about it and know I am a busy women. I ain't got time to be doing all that crap! Plus before you hate on my where do you stand on your stupid resolutions?? Exactly! So anyways back to the point at hand. This year I have decided instead of making a new resolution I will take about 24 things I have yet to learn at age 24. Maybe it will inspire me to learn them. Or maybe someone will give me tips. So if you are some life guru with the answers hit me up!! With out further ado:
1) how to work a hair straightner
Now I have this really awesome (and magical) curly hair that is full of secrets. But I feel like I have not yet reached my right of passage into womanhood because I have no idea how to use a hair straightner to reach a perfectly flawless head of hair. I mean I need to know this! What if there is an emergency, I will be un prepared!
2) what the hell is escrow?
No real comments to make about it because I simply have no idea what it is
3) drive and not get road rage
If you have ever been in a car with me or on the phone with me while I was driving then high know I want to kill every other driver. Everyone on the road but me is an idiot at all times. Actually I scratch this. I think the rest of the world needs to learn to drive then I won't have a problem. This isn't my problem. This is y'all. You best reconize.
4) can one sleep with out a fan on?
Now I have heard some crazy tales of people who can sleep with out a fan on. I really need to talk to these crazy mythical creatures to learn how it is done. It is really a hindrance to sleep with one on. I can't travel with it fear of not having a fan. It's irrational. Maybe hypnosis will work.
5) accessorize
I always think I look flawless but apparently just wearing a watch and pearls is not accesorizing.
6) not to freak out when a baby cries
I love babies and their cute little baby faces. But as soon as that baby starts to cry I go into panic mode thinking satan is trying to take over. Not good folks. (Same for when it uses the bathroom, but that's just nasty)
7) paint my nails with out them looking like they were painted by Ray Charles
I mean I can't be the only one with the problem right?
8) not to get upset about things I can't change
This one has been a major problem in my life lately. People won't change just because you want them too. I need to learn this and not to expect things to happen but more importantly just accept it. I can't change things. I can't make things happen. Got to get over it
9) a 401K?
That's money for when your old and kicking it in the retirement community right?
10) be unashamed of who I am
Because I am flawless and did in fact wake up like this
11) fractions!!
They are numbers from the devil himself and I need to learn how to deal with them
12) don't expect others to be who I want them to be
Yeah that won't happen. Idiot.
13) stop judging.
I can't help it that I am flawless and others are not. I shouldn't judge.
14) take a picture smiling like a normal human being
15) how to call the Doctor on my own
Yeah my mom still does this for me which leads me to
16) my mom is not my personal assistant
I guess it's time I learn to start doing things on my own
17) how to disconnect from my phone.
I feel I can never be in the moment because I am always too worried about my phone. I need to learn to disconnect from it. It doesn't have all the answers ( actually kinda does because it can get google) but I feel if I can learn to disconnect from I then I can be happier. I won't get as upset when I am not contacted by that one person I want to talk to more than any thing ( talking about you Ellen D).
18) properly put on make up!
Maybe because I never wear it I feel like a clown when I do. I want to look runway flawless with it on but I don't want people to know I'm wearing make up. I just want them to assume I am always so flawless
19) other ways to tame my hair
Pretty sure my hairs theme song is "can't be tamed" by Miley Cyrus but that has to be more ways to wear my hair then up or down? Like right?
20) PPO? HMO? insurance?
Yeah what's the difference? What do I need? What do I have?
21) can I dress myself with out others opinion?
I always have to take a pic or send my mom a picture. I have the whole Instagram motto. If there's not a picture of my outfit and it doesn't get so many likes then it doesn't exist
22) as Rafiki says" it doesn't matter, it was in the past"
I need to learn to leave the past in the past and move on
23) a mortgage?
Yeah there's a lot of grown up adult things I don't know. I really need to get my s*** together.
24) how to truly "do what I want"
I am a semi grown ass woman. I need to learn how to start acting like it and doing what I want as opposed to what every one wants me to do. End of story
So that's it. That's what I will focus on this year. You have any tips, holla at me bois (that is to be said like flavor flav)
